I recently came across this article about shame which is something that 95% of my clients deal with at some point in our counseling sessions:
"Dr Brene Brown explains that feelings of shame can quietly marinate over a lifetime. 'Here's the bottom line with shame,' she says. 'The less you talk about it, the more you got it. Shame needs three things to grow exponentially in out lives: secrecy, silence, and judgement.'
By keeping quiet, Brown says your shame will grow. 'It will creep into every corner and crevice of your life', she says.
The antidote, Brown says, is empathy. She explains that by talking about your shame with a friend who expresses empathy, the painful feeling cannot survive. 'Shame depends on me buying into the belief that I am alone', she says.
Here's the bottom line: 'Shame cannot survive being spoken', Brown says. 'It cannot survive empathy.'